The Vomiting Attractor
Written by Adam
A fellow employee down at the mine had an interesting journey to work the other day and I thought it was worth sharing. Please make sure you’re not eating (those exclamation marks don’t agree with me):
I got off the train last night and I was walking along the platform when I spotted a woman teetering on the edge of the platform. Thinking she may be about to jump I slowed down thinking I’ll grab her as she falls only to witness her projectile vomit down on to the track ‘The Exorcist stylie’!! I quickened my pace while I tried to keep my own stomach steady and then told a Network Rail guy that a very sick lady down there needs some help.
Then this morning I was sat innocently reading my Metro and after just setting off a man stood by the glass partition was feeling a little off (can you see what’s coming!?) – instead of letting the glass take the brunt of the waterfall of vomit which shot out of his mouth at a million miles a hour he kindly put his face around the glass and showered 5 people – one poor lady was dripping. I was sat next to victim number 5 thanking my lucky stars that none of it went on me. It was however flowing down the carriage so I had to lift my feet to let it pass. I got off at the next station only to get on the wrong bloody train and end up at Waterloo!!
They say these things come in threes.
Actually TG has some great vomiting stories. Remind me to share them with you sometime.