Walking the Line

No, not Johnny Cash. Oh well, OK, maybe at the end. What I’m really referring to is the inability of much of the adult population to walk in a straight line.

I don’t walk in a perfectly straight line of course. I’m not (quite) like that, however I do walk fast. Walking fast, whilst not actually doing that whole speed walker thing, is not a special gift. Lots of people do it and indeed I’m often overtaken by people who are, quite frankly, jogging. I digress. Whilst overtaking those people out for a stroll (or just with little legs) I’m often dodging from one side to the next at the last minute as people weave directly in front of me. It’s insane. It’s like some sort of invisible magnetism (like most other magnetisms I guess….) that when walking behind someone and initiating what I will refer to as “the overtaking maneuver”, they suddenly take a drunken lurch directly in your path.

It’s even worse when you’re jogging. I imagine my general huffing and puffing (and smell) would warn people of my impending arrival, but no, it’s like they are genuinely surprised by my ninja stealth-like approach. So much so that they feel compelled to defend themselves by obstructing me in any way possible. Maybe I should invest in a cow bell, as it’s now driving me nuts…

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